(Gerald Sinclair) While you might think that when someone is picking at their significant other they are being mean but the truth is those two could be much closer than you realize. Apparently, the couples who are not afraid to laugh at themselves and one another end up sticking together much longer.
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by Gerald Sinclair, December 8th, 2018
The fact that joking around in relationships is a good thing has been proven time and time again. As a matter of fact, one researcher from the University of Kansas by the name of Jeffrey Hall has studied over 15,000 people throughout his years and found that without humor building a strong relationship is not necessarily easy.
The abstract to one of his studies goes as follows:
This investigation examines a sexual selection-based argument regarding humor’s role in courtship (i.e., humor production signals intelligence/creativity). Lens model (n =100) analyses suggest that humor production on Facebook profiles were self-reported and perceived to be associated with extroversion, not intelligence. Study 2 (n = 289) found that extroversion was associated humor production, but high school and college grade point average and American College Test (ACT) scores were not. In Study 3, pairs of opposite-sex strangers (n = 102) interacted for 10–12 min. Males’ humor production and females’ responsive laughter were both associated with females’ dating interest. Both partners’ dating interest was associated with simultaneous laughter. Without support for the sexual selection argument, three alternative explanations of humor’s role in courtship are discussed.
Hall claims that people tend to really want a sense of humor in their partners. He surveyed the findings of over 39 different studies and throughout all of them he overwhelmingly found that humor was extremely important. The couple that laughs together, lasts forever.
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Hall said as follows in a statement:
“People say they want a sense of humor in a mate, but that’s a broad concept.”
“That people think you are funny or you can make a joke out of anything is not strongly related to relationship satisfaction. What is strongly related to relationship satisfaction is the humor couples create together.”
“Say you and your partner share a quirky sense of humor, but romantic comedies or sitcoms do nothing for either of you. So it’s not that any style or a sense of humor is any better or worse. What matters is that you both see quirky humor as hysterical. If you share a sense of what’s funny, it affirms you and affirms your relationship through laughter.”
“It’s good to have humor. It’s better to see it in your partner. And it’s best to share it.”
“It’s not about being a great comedian, but finding what’s funny in the every day and enjoying it together, whether that’s ‘The Simpsons’ or repeating funny things your kids say or The New Yorker cartoons or relishing in the absurdity of life. It is most important you do it together.”
See, as long as you and your partner are on the same page about what the two of you consider to be funny you will do well together. If you like to make fun of your partner but he or she doesn’t like doing the same to you, there may be conflict. You have to be able to understand your partner before really delving into this kind of thing.
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While all relationships will have their ups and downs there is no denying the connection many who are able to laugh together share. Sure, you might be quirky but that’s what makes you who you are. Calling your partner out on his or her quirks is a way of reminding them that you see them for who they truly are even if it may not seem like that to those outside of the relationship.
What do you think about all of this?
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Source:
Yup, especially when she is white and he is black.