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3 Tips for Better Communication During Difficult Conversations

Tuesday, January 22, 2019 By Stillness in the Storm Leave a Comment

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(Stillness in the Storm Editor) There are a few things we must learn in order to have true freedom, prosperity, and benevolence in our personal lives and society. One of those skills is communication. The following article offers some advice as to how to cultivate good communication skills. With these in hand, an individual can positively contribute to the lives of their fellows and the world at large, should they also dedicate themselves to learn the law so as to respect life with conscious precision.

Related Admitting Your Grievances Against Your Partner: Your Best Hope For Healing Your Relationship

Honor, responsibility, and rights are key to freedom. Your freedom means nothing if the people around you refuse to respect your rights. Similarly, if you want to live in a truly free world, learning the law and using it effectively in your life is the surest way to success.

The law, from an everyday perspective, might be described simply as taking the time to respect the rights of those around you, be they natural persons, or organizations of natural persons called corporations. In order to do this effectively, communication is required. And it should go without saying that when anyone violates our rights it is our duty, not only for ourselves but out of respect of the law itself, to defend them.

The law, in this sense, is the sacred tool all people and societies use to create peace, harmony, and prosperity. Thus, we’re all, in potential, deeply interested in protecting it.

Respecting another person’s rights is effectively the act of respecting their free will—making sure you do or don’t do what someone else wants.

But what happens when what someone wants goes against another person’s free will? This is a question of rights.

For example, if your neighbor has an apple tree and another neighbor is hungry and wants an apple, what right does the second neighbor have to the goods of the first? Without asking permission, the second neighbor has no right to the apple tree. But if they ask, the first neighbor might give them an apple to fill their belly.

Communication on the part of the second neighbor was what allowed the first to convey their rights to the apple to the second. In this act, the law was upheld, honor was maintained on both individuals parts, and harmony was achieved. But what would have happened if the second neighbor just took the apples they wanted? At this point, the first neighbor’s rights would have been violated and this would have given rise to controversy, disagreement, and even bitterness and hatred. The first neighbor might decide to get even, seek revenge, and cause some damage to the second neighbor’s house. In turn, the second neighbor might decide to retaliate.

Communication didn’t play a role in the second scenario, which led to open conflict.

The keys to harmony, goodness, prosperity, and freedom are within our grasp.

Our world is plagued by injustice, hardship, and suffering—none of which would last if we the people chose, of ourselves, to gain wisdom in communication and begin the work of unifying for change.

 – Justin

Buy Book Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life, 3rd Edition: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships (Nonviolent Communication Guides)

Source – Psych Central

by Susie & Otto Collins, December 23rd, 2019

Don’t make things harder than they have to be.

Communication is one of the core elements of healthy relationships, which is why learning how to improve your communication skills is critical.

Effective communication can stop arguments before they start, help you overcome misunderstandings, and leave nothing in the way of confusion about what you and your partner want or need.

One of the most upsetting feelings you could ever experience when you’re in a relationship or marriage is when you feel like you can’t say what you think or how you feel and be understood. You feel unbearably empty inside, which sucks the life out of you and your relationship.

This Exercise Is Key to Effective, Zero-Arguing Communication

There are plenty of reasons when you may not feel like you can open up and be honest with your partner or summon the courage to ask for what you want.

But, if you want to be happy, knowing how to communicate effectively and ask for what you want — in a way your spouse or partner can hear it — is something you must be able to do.

If you can’t communicate with your partner in this way, you not only feel disconnected from them, but you’re probably also angry and upset, even if you don’t want to admit it.

Buy Book Where to Draw the Line: How to Set Healthy Boundaries Every Day

So, what’s the solution? How can you say what’s on your mind and in your heart without fear of what your partner might say, do or how they might react and still hope to be understood. How can you really talk to your spouse or partner without either of you getting angry, hurt or defensive?

In a nutshell, there are three things that can make the difference when you communicate with someone important to you: It’s your mindset, your strategy, and the words you use.

You’re fed up with something your partner’s doing, but you know that if you say anything, you’ll start a fight and make it worse. But there are ways to avoid this!

Here are 3 of the most effective communication skills happy couples in healthy relationships use to make even the most difficult conversations easier.

1. Remain Open to Possibilities

Before you say a word, look at your internal mindset. It might be saying, “They will never change. It will always be this way,” — or whatever your mind chatter says.

You have to open to the possibility that things could get better between the two of you. It starts with you softening your approach toward him or her and seeing even small results. You also need to get clear within yourself what it is that you want and that comes from a “knowing” inside you.

When you’re calm, clear, and not coming from anger, you’ll not be triggered so easily to fall into old destructive patterns.

Buy Book Toxic Friends: A Practical Guide to Recognizing and Dealing with an Unhealthy Friendship

2. Change Your Approach

If you’re not getting what you want, you’ll need to change your pattern of behavior. Whatever you’ve been doing that hasn’t worked (like withdrawing, complaining, arguing or manipulating), can be put behind you so you’re open to a different approach.

What do you really want? How can you put some good communication skills to work instead of just feeling hurt and walking away?

If you want more attention from your partner, what might be something tangible you can ask him or her instead of veiled complaints about what you’re not getting? This is an approach that can really make a difference to your and your partner’s connection in the relationship.

3. Explore Changing the Words You Use

So often the words you use and the way you say them are just habits from the past, but you can learn how to communicate better.

You learned ways of communicating from your parents and other influencers and you may not be aware of how those words are understood/received by someone else.

Compare this sentence and the way it’s said. With sarcasm: “You’re never romantic! How about dinner out and a bouquet of roses every once in a while!”

Or, when said with sincerity: “I’d love to have some time alone with you this weekend. Would you be willing to set aside some time for a special date night together?”

Buy Book The Secrets of Body Language: An Illustrated Guide to Knowing What People Are Really Thinking and Feeling

5 Things People With Deliriously Happy Marriages Always Do When They Fight

As you read both of these, you can feel the difference. If you can feel it, your partner will also! If you’re afraid to say what you think or what you feel, don’t stay frustrated and don’t say or do something you’ll come to regret later.

Use these tips to improve communication in relationships and turn difficult conversations into something positive for both of you! It’s time to create the relationship you’ve always wanted.

This guest article originally appeared on YourTango.com: How To Make Even The Most Difficult Conversations With The Person You Love Easier For Both Of You.

Buy Music Proven to Reduce Stress and Anxiety by 65%

Stillness in the Storm Editor: Why did we post this?

Communication is a foundational cornerstone for the proper and uplifted living of the enlightened society. The preceding article provides some tips about how to communicate effectively, which is critical to learn in order to realize a truly free, moral, and benevolent civilization, wherein each individual has the capacity to honor and respect each other’s rights.

– Justin

Not sure how to make sense of this? Want to learn how to discern like a pro? Read this essential guide to discernment, analysis of claims, and understanding the truth in a world of deception: 4 Key Steps of Discernment – Advanced Truth-Seeking Tools


Stillness in the Storm Editor’s note: Did you find a spelling error or grammar mistake? Send an email to [email protected], with the error and suggested correction, along with the headline and url. Do you think this article needs an update? Or do you just have some feedback? Send us an email at [email protected]. Thank you for reading.

Source:

https://psychcentral.com/blog/3-tips-for-better-communication-during-difficult-conversations/

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Filed Under: Consciousness, Evergreen, Psychology, Solutions, Uncategorized Tagged With: communication, harmony, justin deschamps, law, prosperity, psychology, rights, social harmony, solutions, unity

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